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Ramadan: I Feel I Don’t Do My Best

Questioner

Anonymous

Reply Date

Jun 16, 2017

Question

As-salamu Alaikum sister, what can one do with anxiety in Ramadan? It is going too fast and I don't feel that I'm good enough in my worshipping. This makes me disappointed and I feel guilty for not seizing this great opportunity as I should.

Counselor

Answer


Ramadan: I Feel I Don't Do My Best

In this counseling answer:

Creating a plan can be an incredibly useful way to get the most of this month. But make sure the goals you set yourself are achievable.


Wa ‘Alaikum Salaam sister,

It is common to feel this kind of anxiety during Ramadan; you are not alone. Ramadan is a month full of reward, so it encourages us to focus on our worship. It is then natural that people become anxious that they are not doing enough. All is not lost, however; we still have some days to increase our good deeds and acts of worship and benefit from this blessed month.

Creating a plan can be an incredibly useful way to get the most of this month. Have yourself a goal in mind and create a plan to achieve it. Some goals people commonly have might be to read a certain amount of the Qur’an, study the Tafsir or a certain surah, or study the Seerah, for example.

Make sure the goal you set yourself is achievable; otherwise, you could cause yourself further undue anxiety.

Also, allow yourself a little more time than you might expect to accomplish this goal to account for any potential unforeseen circumstances.

Be realistic about what you can achieve. You know yourself better than anyone. Once you have decided on an end goal, break it down into smaller daily portions. For example, if you plan to read 150 pages of the Quran, plan to read 10 pages a day over the next 15 days. Likewise, you might prefer to allocate a certain amount of time each day to read the Quran without worrying about how many pages you read. Try to stick to a regular time each day and protect this time to work towards this goal.

Many people find straight after Fajr a very productive time; others prefer other times. Whichever works best for you. Protect this time and do not allow yourself to get busy with other tasks that can wait for later, unless absolutely necessary. Using the same time each day will help to form a healthy habit that you can continue to implement after Ramadan, too.

Try putting your plan somewhere you will see, like on the fridge. This will help you to monitor your progress and get a sense of accomplishment as you progress towards your goal. Having it visible will also help you to feel accountable and to increase motivation to achieve each daily task.

Also, remember to manage your time around other tasks, such as housework, to ensure you allow yourself plenty of time to accomplish your goals this Ramadan without rushing. In sha’ Allah, this should help to ease your anxieties this Ramadan.

May Allah (swt) make this Ramadan a productive and successful one for you, full of positive accomplishments.

Salam,

***

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About Hannah Morris

Hannah Morris is a mum of 4 and she currently works as Counsellor and Instructor of BSc. Psychology at the Islamic Online University (IOU). She obtained her MA degree in Psychology and has over 10 years of experience working in health and social care settings in the UK, USA, and Ireland. Check out her personal Facebook page, ActiveMindCare, that promotes psychological well-being in the Ummah. (www.facebook.com/activemindcare)

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