In this counseling answer:
The counselor believes that if you think your ex-boyfriend is a good Muslim and a good person who can support you and be there for you, then it is better to leave your husband than cheating on him and being unfaithful. But do not just follow your heart; think with your head to make the best decision and ask Allah (swt) to guide you.
As Salaam ‘Aleikom sister,
You are still very young and it is sad to hear about your situation with your husband.
Unfortunately, many Asians/Arabic parents and families pressurize their children to marry someone they don’t like. I am sure your parents only wanted to see you happy and wanted the best for you, but it is wrong to pressurize someone into a marriage. It must be really hard for you to live with your husband when you don’t feel anything for him.
Being in contact with your ex-boyfriend is not a good idea. It will not help you to develop a feeling for your husband when you are talking to someone you already have feelings for. It makes the whole situation worse and it is completely wrong. You are not only cheating on your husband, but you are also doing a haram act by sending your nude pics to a man who is not your husband. It is not your husband’s fault that you were pressurized into marrying him. I assume he does not even know about it. He loves you, and it is not fair toward him.
Does your ex-boyfriend want to marry you, and did you tell your parents that you wanted to marry him before you got married to your husband?
If you think your ex-boyfriend is a good Muslim and a good person who can support you and be there for you, then it is better to leave your husband than cheating on him and being unfaithful. You are allowed to ask for khula (divorce) in Islam. It might not be encouraged in Islam to divorce, but you can if you have to. Now that you do not have children with your husband it is easier to separate. Divorce can have a bad impact on the children and make it hard for a mother to look after them alone.
If you think you can’t be happy with your husband, then I suggest that you sit down with your parents and talk properly with them about it first.
In meantime, do not talk too much with your ex-boyfriend and do not send him pictures of you. If he and you want to marry each other then you should go the halal way rather than do things the haram way. He will lose respect for you if you send him nude pics and might not want to marry you later. Make sure he is worth you leaving your husband. You are very young and might be very emotional and not think rationally. I advise you to think properly and give yourself plenty of time to make a decision.
Follow your instinct and trust your parents’ judgment as well as they have lived longer and have more experience with life. What we believe is right for us is not always right. Do not just follow your heart but think with your head.
May Allah (swt) guide you on the right path and make it easier for you.
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