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My Father Molests Me

06 September, 2018
Q Assalam Alaikum. I'm lost and don't know what to do. My mom is dead and my father has been molesting me since I can remember, and no one believes me.

When I told my mom's family, he became mad at me and doesn’t give me school transportation money anymore. He doesn’t give me any money for anything. He said I should and do prostitution to get money. I have no one to go to because no one cares about me. I have a few relatives who are selfish. I cannot tell them the law. They will make fun of me. Please, help me.

Answer


In this counseling answer:

• Seek assistance from someone outside of your family.

• You could look if there are any groups or support organizations locally to you where you may discuss this matter.

• We have suggested for you some helpline services in your area, try to make use of some of them, in addition to other available avenues of help.


Assalamu alaikum wa Rahmatullah wa barakatuh sister,

This is a difficult situation that you are in, but it is very important that you get some support for this for the sake of your well-being.

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Whilst you’re feeling down, it probably does feel like no one cares about you. However, it is highly likely that there are some that do as much as you feel like they don’t.

Perhaps, the best place to start, since you don’t feel comfortable to talk to anyone in your family about it yet, is to seek assistance from someone outside of your family. As you come to feel more confident and comfortable to tell your story, you will feel better equipped and able to talk to family members about the issue. You may find that those you feel don’t care actually do.

You could look if there are any groups or support organizations locally to you where you may discuss this matter. They will be equipped with the beat information locally to you regarding where to get direct help and assistance with this matter.

 

In sha Allah, this will open the doors to other solutions for you too to be in a stronger position to escape the abuse.

Editor’s note:

We have collected for you all the helplines in your country you can reach out for help. Please, sister, do not hesitate to do this step!

Human Development Initiatives (For Women, Children, and Youth)

0806 353 1872

Project Alert on Violence Against Women

Tel: 08180091072

Email: [email protected]

Child Abuse

08085753932/ 08102678442

Domestic Violence

08057542266, 08102678443

You could look into online groups as well. Whilst they can’t give you the same level of support, they can be a very useful source of comfort where you can talk more freely and get advice from sisters who have been through the same situation.

Aside from seeking support for this specific issue, it is good for your psychological health to be with others and talk to others, even if the conversation is not about the abuse. Having social support will help curb the feeling of loneliness that you seem to be experiencing.

May Allah bring you to ease and guide you to someone who will be able to support you through this.

Amen,

***

Disclaimer: The conceptualization and recommendations stated in this response are very general and purely based on the limited information provided in the question. In no event shall AboutIslam, its counselors or employees be held liable for any damages that may arise from your decision in the use of our services.

Read more:

My Abusive Father is Ruining Our Life

I Ran Away from My Abusive Parents

Do You Have Abusive Parents? Here Are 4 Things You Can Do

About Hannah Morris
Hannah Morris is a mum of 4 and she currently works as Counsellor and Instructor of BSc. Psychology at the Islamic Online University (IOU). She obtained her MA degree in Psychology and has over 10 years of experience working in health and social care settings in the UK, USA, and Ireland. Check out her personal Facebook page, ActiveMindCare, that promotes psychological well-being in the Ummah. (www.facebook.com/activemindcare)