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Daughter Talks Too Much About Love

Questioner

Anonymous

Reply Date

Oct 18, 2017

Question

Salamu alaikum. My daughter who is 10 is talking much about love and becomes very shy when a boy wants to play with her in the club or at school. Is this normal? I thought this age should be pure and innocent. How can I explain to her that she can play with them and there is nothing wrong in this to feel shy about? she is still too young to think about love and this stuff. Isn't she?

Counselor

Answer


Daughter Talks Too Much About Love

Wa ‘ Alaykum Salaam,

Ahh, the innocence of youth is something a parent wants to keep for their child! This is a good thing.

First, I recommend giving an honest assessment of the child’s environment to identify where she may have gotten these messages of love. Influences come from so many places!

I agree with you. Age 10 still has so much fun and innocence involves. Preserving it is a must. I recommend asking your daughter the reasons she hesitates to play with boys. Having modesty is a good thing. She may feel confused about playing with boys and having appropriate boundaries. We don’t know. Clear up misconceptions she may have. Ask what she believes is the best engagement between boys and girls.

Lastly, this may be her personality. She may be a young girl who will be modest in the presence of boys! If so, allow her to have her innate personality. She gets to develop her own personality. In sha‘ Allah.

Salam,

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About Naaila Moumaris-Clay

Naa'ila Clay, the wife of the husband-wife counseling duo "That Clay Couple", holds firm to the belief that Islam, clinical interventions, old-fashioned wit & wisdom will get the relief for your head & your heart in relationships. Mrs. Clay has a slew of training, certifications, created marriage & premarital courses, co-authored 2 e-books and has an M.S. in Mental Health Counseling. You can contact her: www.hasanandnaaila.com or www.facebook.com/thatclaycouple.

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